It's a Girl!

My daughter was born by planned (but unscheduled) C-section on 06/30/2008. She was 5lbs 13.5oz and 20in long. We had irratable cervix and bleeding in early 2nd tri and then found an eccentric cord insertion at 19 week ultrasound (which is 3x as frequent in IVF). Our eccentric cord insertion went to velimenous cord insertion at 26 week ultrasound which resulted in slowed fetal growth & low amniotic fluid...also with low amniotic fluid baby couldn't turn from being breech, so when they got positive lung development at 37w ultrasount they pulled her that day. My OB knew it was possible and I made sure I didn't eat anything after breakfast so we could do it that day if needed. She technically is normal birth weight and full term, so only the C-section was unsual.

Kicked to the Curb

Had my last u/s with RE and have been given the boot the the OB. Dh came along and was a wee bit bubbly. We're at 20mm which puts us at 8w4d when my date is 8w6d....constistant with the 7 day transfer of slow blasts. hb = 178 ...wow, that's triple my resting rate. Saw stubby little arm buds, big head, and curling umbilical cord. Placenta is placed on upper posteior, which I guess is good. So no more "bean" we are in "grape" territory.

RE said he usually does final u/s at 9.5 weeks but he is leaving for Carribean cruise today and pushed it up earlier. Said at 9.5 weeks 99% of fatal trisomies will have resulted in m/c, so he said at 8.5 weeks he's 95% sure my pg is viable. He also dictated a note to my OB indicating I was not high risk and should only need genetic tests indicated by my age. *yeah*

Dh then proceeded to harrange me about how big this baby was gonna be...9-12 lbs runs in his family, 7-9 lbs in mine. Whoa boy! When Dh is 6'5.5" and I'm 5'11" the genetics run big.

I really wanted to go to Coldstone Creamery on the way back. I had saved extra calories just for the outting and it was closed with a sign on the door for employees to call to get information on why the store was closed. *bummer* Ended up eating my diet ice cream at home.

I guess this is my last blog until birth, because I have left my RE and the realm of IVF/ART. Big kudos to Dr. Daly & his staff at Grand Rapids Fertility & IVF making this possible. I can't say that I have enjoyed myself, but I do finally feel optimistic about finally becoming a mother.

First Ultrasound

Weight: 157.4 lbs
Mood: a little moody
Medications: none!

So there is a little story to tell before we get to the results of my first ultrasound....

Last night I was laying on my stomach in bed waiting for my dh to finish up in the bathroom. It's my turn so I do some sort of quick maneuver to "jump" out of bed and end of pulling my entire uterus region out of wack. I doubled over in pain/discomfort. It passed quickly, but I was kicking myself silly.

Later that evening when I used the bathroom I had two light, mucusy spots of blood. I could have cried right there, but nothing followed those two spots. I had a horrible night of waking nightmares and squirrel brained worry.

I get up this morning and I am touchy in that region, kinda like something swelled-up
overnight and for the first time in all of the IVF process, I skipped Spinning. I was so nervous that I screwed something up. Of course, this entire time I am also thinking that maybe this is just the beginning of morning sickness. I already have what I call afternoon/early evening malaise about half of the time, but my mornings have been just fine.

Well onto the the ultrasound. I did tell the RE what happened and how I was worried that I had done some damage. He didn't seem too concerned especially after we found my proto-incipient baby, complete with fetal pole, yoke sack, and a nice little heartbeat of 118 bpm. Next ultrasound is the December 12th, which he admitted was early because he is going on vacation. He also instructed me to make my first appointment with local OB for later that week.

Oh...and my official due date is July 16th. We'll tell family as a Christmas present and friends at our New Year's party.

Yeah I Stopped Posting

Weight: 160.4lbs
Mood: Normal
Medications: One last progesterone pill

Dh was wondering why I had stopped posting. Well this is my IVF blog, not my pregnancy blog. Since I'm off daily meds and am now in monitoring of my early pregnancy, I don't feel compelled to post everyday. I also found other IVF blogs annoying when I'd click through and they are blogging about their 3 year old twins having left IVF behind years ago.

I had my second beta today. I had a feeling it was going to be just fine because my breasts found another cup size this weekend. So my first beta at 7dp7dt was 29.6 and my second at 11dp7dt was 193. Also my progesterone is high enough that I can stop taking the pills. So I'm off meds entirely! I must have not done too much damage to my ovaries if they are producing progesterone for me.

My "hunt for the embie" ultrasound is in two weeks. I'll give another update then.

BFP

Weight: 156.2 lbs
Mood: Bi-polar day
Medications: 1 shot of 1/2 ml progesterone in oil, switching to oral med tonight

So what does BFP mean....BIG FREAKING POSITIVE. In the words of the nurse, "We have a pregnancy". She shocked the hell out of me, I was not expecting it what so ever. My blood test was at 8:30 am and she called at noon. I betcha they call the postives first cause those are at least good news. She rattled off my hcg and pregesterone levels and tried to coax my pharmacy name out of me so she could call in my new perscription while I sat here slack jawed.

My coworkers where over the partition and Pam remarked to Missey.."She sounds shocked". But of course, since Pam isn't from my office and is not clued in, I had to wait until she left to confirm for Missey that it was the nurse with good news. So I have to admit my husband was not the first person to know because my coworker overheard the phone conversation. Well heck, I suspect the nurse #1, the doctor and the lab tech all knew too. So that makes at least four people.

Soon as I could clear the office of customers I called dh and said "Hello Daddy". Ok, he was shocked too. I usually don't call him at school, but exceptions must be made. That and I think it might have been tacky to tell him via instant messenger.

I had to call the nurse (#2) back because I didn't write down my beta numbers. My first beta at 14dpo is 29.6 which would explain the two negative home pregnancy tests in the last three days. I would have only started picking up on those today because most require 25-50 on the beta to even cause a faint positive.

I have to go back on Monday for my second beta to see if my hcg numbers are increasing like they are supposed to. Dh wants to go out for red bloody steak tonight, and I am sure that I'm the designated driver for the next 9 months.

Last Shot!

Weight: 157.6lbs
Mood: Glad this thing is winding down
Medications: PIO IM shot 1/2 ml twice daily

Gave myself my last shot! Woot! I was getting sick of those things and being tied to a schedule. Official beta blood test is tomorrow. I noticed how my weight was up 3lbs as a result of transfer and how it went down on the first morning I tested. Seems the embies stuck around for the weekend before checking out.

I not as upset as you could imagine I'd be. I think this is going to work next time or maybe the time after. The success rates for my age group is only 35% which means you have to try and fail a few times. Next time's goal is egg quality over quantity.

I rolled over my sick time for the first time in 10 years, it's going to cut into holiday shopping money but hopefully if we catch on our February cycle I can take a nice long holiday break next year. I'm not looking forward to February driving for my monitering though.

I keep talking about that bottle of red wine, but I think I may decide to do the perfect margarita at Applebees. I think I'll go whole hog on the coffee tomorrow after beta too by getting a full on expresso.

As for my blogging plans, I'll post whenever there is a IVF related event to note, but this everyday stuff is going to stop. I blog my final, after period, weight for comparison to pre-cycle. I really wonder how much extra weight these PIO shots boobs are. They really are what my size should be and maybe instead of the boob reduction I wanted, I should invest in my real size. Ha!

Right Cheek, Right Thigh, Left Cheek, Left Thigh, Repeat

Weight: 157.4 lbs
Mood: Normal, but tired after auditions
Medications: PIO shots twice per day 1/2 ml IM

They kept me late last night for auditions but did let me sing for a lead. I'm guessing I'll be a mission girl, probably the trombone player because the director and I used to march trombone together back in college. Actually considering who we've got, we could probably stage the Mission band with real instrumentalists.

I always know I'm doing a good job driving out to Vermontville if I see at least one deer. I saw two last night in the driving sleet. I also have the ritual of stopping for a 20 oz diet Faygo, but they where out and I ended up with something caffinated.

I was feeling crampy and PMSy yesterday, that's faded today. I feel my libido coming back and that has been actively gone for about 3 weeks now. I won't miss the PIO shots, I won't miss the worrying about how I move or what I lift and I won't miss the secrecy.

I told my boss on his return from Dodge City on the "death" of my embies. Just wanted to assure him that he won't have to freak out about a future maternity leave just yet. Actually now that the memory of egg retrival has faded, I feel like I can do this again. Ask me the day after retrieval and you would have had a different answer.

I'm 5dp7dt and not exactly optimistic.

99% Accurate When Normal Hormone Levels Present

Weight: 160.4 lbs
Mood: Bummed Again
Medications: PIO IM shots 1/2 ml twice daily

Well I used the home pregnancy test today and got a big fat negative (BFN). My beta test is Thursday, but I wouldn't be surprised if my period showed before that. Ok, I admit that I am only 4 days past a 7 day transfer, but I didn't even get a whisper of a line and the test I took was supposed to be sensitive enough to read 5 days before your expected period.

I kinda used the gym as a place to work out some of those negative emotions. Wendy really worked us hard in Spinning class and I didn't exactly hold back. As my true BFN approaches, I try to steer myself back into normal thinking. I'm going to go audition for "Guys & Dolls" tonight, that should put me back into normalcy for then next three monthes at least. I figure we'll cycle again in February after the musical and before we audition for "Nunsence" which stages in late April.

Oops, Almost Forgot to Blog

Weight: 161 lbs
Mood: tired
Medications: PIO shots twice daily 1/2 ml

Not much to report today. Slept in, went to gym and then I checked out the new Cascade Meijers. Nice store, I could spend hours in there. Some of my wierder purchases: frozen squid, mint-licorice mentos, wine gummy candy, spotted dick (British sponge bread with raisins), India butter chicken sauce, tofu noodles and leeks.

Nothing much on the IVF front, I don't feel pregnant. My legs are killing me though. My upper thighs are black and blue all over and very stiff. I had dh do a butt shot just to give some relief.

I'm a bit put off by a fellow poster on the IVF boards, she's shrilly declaring that my RE's lab killed my embies because they cultured them to blast. Give me a break, they're a "Right to Life" clinic, they'd have transfered them on a Sunday if they couldn't handle the extra culture. This is the same person that complains that her Hispanic housekeeper farts too much and that IVF is accessable to everyone. She is a rich east coaster who has no clue it seems.

Pickles, Hold the Ice Cream

Weight: 159 lbs
Mood: Normal
Medications: PIO shot 1/2 twice daily

Sorry, but I don't feel pregnant. I just don't. The boobs are a side effect of the PIO injections and while nicer than my normal ones, don't mean anything. We went out for dinner last night and I tried to show my sister the pictures of my embies before anyone else showed and she didn't have much oppurtunity to look. They aren't exactly impressive anyway.

What will I do better my next cycle? I will cut my exercise to one hour and force myself to eat my daily intake plus an extra 300 calories. I'll try to avoid artificial sweeteners, pop, beer, caffeine and wine and go for the lean protein and fatted dairy. I will take 3 whole days after retrieval to recover too. Five aetretic eggs where five lost oppurtunities. We only had a 25% 4cell to blast rate when we should have had closer to 50%. Between me and the RE maybe we can get a good protocol sorted out. I so wanted to have embies on ice just in case and I have nothing.

No Beer for Embies

Weight: 159 lbs
Mood: Sleepy but Sure
Medications: PIO shots 1/2 ml twice per day.

I'm officially 1 day past 7 day transfer of 2 blasts = 1dp7dt. They had birthday food for Jan down in Planning & Zoning and I cowed on low fat cheesecake bars and trail mix. I better be pregnant because I'll be paying the piper come the day after beta if I'm not. We are going out to the Walldorff tonight with 4 other couples. No beer for me! No caffine for me either.

Dh isn't too thrilled with the no sex restriction for 5 full days, hopefully he won't start crawling the walls too soon. I'm not supposed to jog, run or lift heavy weights. I did rake today though, they didn't say anything about that. I just cannot believe someone would have the patience to go on bed rest for 2 or 3 days after transfer.

My left nipple is feeling present...which is NOT and indication of pregnancy. My left nipple always does this about 5 days before my period. It's normal.

I'll try to remember to scan the picture of my blasts to post up here this weekend. You can really tell the good one from the bad.

7th Day Transfer of 2 Blastocysts

Weight: 157.4 lbs
Mood: Keeping a lid on grief and optimism
Meds: PIO shots twice a day 1/2 ml

An evening of crying, soul searching, gnashing of teeth, rending of clothes and lots of chocolate consumed, that was my Halloween. We where told yesterday morning (day 6) that none of our embies where progressing past morula stage. They had until this morning at 10:30am before they where declared arrested. I couldn't cry until I got home from work, dh said if felt like he had been stabbed.

I had three big goals in my life and one was ripped from me. I feared perminent sperm disability, I feared for my own fertility, and I feared the looming expense of a 2nd try at something that is now a proven failure. I had to cry it out before I could step back and reassess the goal and it's alternatives. I can say that I did sleep well for a change having run a low grade fever with intestinal issues the last two days.

So with a heavy heart, dh and I set out for our IVF #1 post-mortum. It was nice enough day at least, the drive was quick and we arrived 10 minutes early.

Things started looking up with Nurse #2 entered the waiting room with our clipboard. Thats when I knew that something was positive. It wasn't the RE himself who is the bearer of bad news. I asked "We have something, I thought they all went belly up yesterday". She flipped the page and said we where transfering two. So she directed me into the surgical suite, asked me to strip waist down and empty my bladder (a retroverted uterus must be good for something).

The RE came in and that's when we had the "discussion". He fears for my egg quality, with slow stimming, 5 of 15 mature eggs disintergrating after retrivel, my age and dh's antibodies. The eggs I did get just didn't know what to do once they where embryos. At a 7 day transfer of what is developmentally a 5 day blast we have fallen out of sync. From what I've read late transfers are more likely negative and more likely result in a false chemical pregnancy. The RE didn't want to pin it solely on egg quality with only the results of one cycle and one tried protocol. He also said it could have just been a bad month to make those demands on my system.

So when (if) we got to round 2, it will be a different protocol to see if we can change the mix of maturation rates, egg quality and quantity.

Either way we transfered two blasts! The other 6 arrested, but we got two. We had one fully expanded average blast that was hatching and one partially expanded blast with a huge fragment in its middle. The transfer is similar to a pap smear without the nasty cotton swab, but then you have to lay with your butt up in the air for 1.5 hours. The scheduled my b-HCG test (blood pregnancy test) for next week Thursday.

Some people lay down for two days after transfer. That just wouldn't work for me, I would go nuts and its not proven to help or harm implantation. I was so hungry afterward dh let me choose lunch spot and we went to Seoul Garden with is a Asian (Korean, Japanese, Chinese) & Sushi bar. I didn't get to have beer or wine at all, which is what I planned for the failure of transfer. (I still have that bottle of Saki set aside for the 99% chance of a blood pregnancy test negative result.) We then went to the mall looking for games for the Wii and a Game Cube memory chip to save the Pikmin game to.

Officially I put my chances of pregnancy this cycle down to 20% versus the 60% I was anticipating before the morula issues popped up. On the bright side, we budgeted 10K for IVF and have only used 5.8K so far. Our insurance has covered $2000 in meds and about $1000 in labs/office visits. Another bonus is that we've paid one-quarter of that home equity line off already so we'll be in much better position for the second go round.

IVF Sucks!

Weight: 156.4 lbs
Mood: Um yeah, no optimism left here
Medications: PIO shots twice a day

So when you are supposed to call the RE's office at 9 am and he calls you at work at 8:50 am...

Not good. It's day 5 and we don't have blasts. He wants me to come in tomorrow at 10:30 and IF we have anything to transfer we will, otherwise we need to have the discussion on what we learned this cycle.

Not a good sign either way. Glad we took them to blasts, we would have never learned that there was an issue, we'd just keep getting negatives after transfers.

8 to nada in one day. Don't even want to get into the emotional stuff until I have some time to process it myself and get some distance from the grief.

The Race is On

Weight: 157.4 lbs
Mood: Okie Dokie
Medications: PIO shot twice a day

So I call this morning for embryo update: they say transfer tomorrow. I have 6 compacting morulas, and the other two are at the 4-5 cell stage and one is starting to compact. I am supposed to call in again tomorrow at 9 am to get the exact appointment time.

Halloween Embies!

8 Happy Little Embryos; No Transfer Set

Weight: 158.4 lbs
Mood: Normal
Medications: PIO 1/2 ml twice daily


I called today to see how my "Eight is Enough" batch of embryos are doing. All hanging in there at pre-Morula stage. They can't give me grades because they are undifferentiated cells at this point. Also, because I have no leading contenders for transfer I have to call back tomorrow morning to see if they need me in tomorrow, Wednesday or Thursday. It doesn't look like they chose to freeze any at 4 cells which is fine by me. Halloween would be great by me, very memorable.


I didn't get to write about the fine ethnic dining we had this weekend. We took dsd to a Japanese restaurant for lunch after her soccer game. Dh ordered the bento box, dsd ordered tempura udon and I ordered quail egg soba. I liked mine the least, a raw egg dropped in a bowl of hot buckwheat noodles. Dsd's what much more interesting and tasty, tempur shrimp & vegging, with raw egg in hot wheat noodles. Dh's bento box had pickled veggies, california roll, pork, shirmp, potato salad and tempura. I'm starting to think that the only thing I really like in Japanese food is sushi/sashimi.


We went out to Habana Cuban restaurant last night with friends from Ann Arbor. They had just been there that week and it came highly recommended. It was a definate change of pace from typical "mexican" flavoring. Lots of lemon juice and tropical fruits & veggies. I really liked dh's shreaded port dish. The appetizers and sides where also really yummy.


Dh and I discussed getting a world map and pushpins for all the ethnic food types we've eaten in a restaurant or made at home since we where married. He parents have a US map with all the places they visited since married and it is getting quite full.


I went to Spinning class this morning. It felt awesome to be healthy again. No aches, no twinges and no fear of hurting myself (or my eggs). I am worried about how well I'm administering my PIO shots

No Nothings

Weight: 161.4 lbs
Mood: Up and Down
Medications: 1/2 ml progesterone in oil intermuscular injection

Missing yesterday's phone call and they didn't leave a message. So no news is good news right?

Spent the weekend at in-laws. I had to do my own injections in the upper thigh. I couldn't catch dh's eye Saturday night, the boob tube had captured him. This morning we where sharing a room with dsd and I had to discreatly sneak out at 6 am for shot. This evening we where on the freeway and we stopped at a Panera Bread and I did the injection in the bathroom. Not a single shot in the butt yet.

I had to take it really easy yesterday, every ounce of liquid I drank I retained all day and peed out at night. Daily fluctuation of about 3 lbs. I tried getting some powerade and that seemed to work pretty well, but carbonated beverage was instant bloat.

I did try going for a walk this afternoon, felt a little bit touchy but otherwise ok. I'm not moving too fast, I had to remind long-legged dh to slow down for me. What I did on Thursday night and Friday Morning....FOOLISH. High carb & sugar foods cause water retention and Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrom is fluid retention. Working out...prolly pretty dumb too.

Saying that, I have packed my bags for Spinning class tomorrow. We find out tomorrow if our transfer is Tuesday or Wednesday, how many and how many of what was left survived their freeze.

Ninety-nine Red Balloons

Weight: 159.4 lbs
Mood: Optimistic
Medications: Doxicycline twice per day, PIO 1/2 ml in PM

So I told you about the fabulous pig out, now for the after affect. By bedtime last night I had bloated to a not so healthy 166lbs. All the fluid seemed to be in my post weight lose skin folds around my belly. I didn't have any of the other signs of OHSS, so I decided to be patient and wait until morning before deciding what to do.

Every two hours last night I am up in the bathroom peeing and this morning back down in normal range. I promise to be more careful with my liquids & carbs today. Carbs I know would normally account for some of that, but geez!

We are off to Ypsilanti/Ann Arbor for dsd's soccer game. It's game day at U of M so the place should be a traffice mess. Dh hopes to get downtown and parked so we can window shop while the football freaks are tailgating. My only goal for today was to carve pumpkins with dsd at MIL's house.

Speaking of MIL, we start PIO shots tonight and she's a nurse. We have a real injection professional in the house and we are going to do our PIO shots in her basement under her nose. If you are reading this blog you are either on the short list of people who know, or a stranger. Of course this list seems to grow everytime I look around: our immediate work supervisor's know, my office manager knows something, dh told one of his coworkers, my sister & husband, dh's sister & husband, and our mutual friend Patty, the soon to be massage therapist.

Dh says nurse #2 was impressed that we kept a tight circle on this. I guess many 1st time IVFer's tell everyone and then have to deal with all that attention and emotional crap. Then they get nailed with a negative result and it gets worse. Like I said before, I'm not looking for pity. After the last two days, I'm not sure I'd make a career out of IVF like some people have.

Crash

Weight: 161 lbs
Mood: Depressed
Medications Doxycycline twice per day

What happens when you take away a women's eggs and she had no polar bodies on her ovaries to produce progesterone....you get instant depression. Couple that with horrible cramps and issues using anything in the gut lower than the stomach = bad day.

Last night we went out to the Walldorff for dinner. For the first time in years I just let loose and pigged out. I felt so awful physically that I drowned myself in grease. My menu last night: 20 oz oatmeal stout, deep fried portabella fries with honey mustard dip, batter dipped Montey Cristo sandwich with raspberry sauce, big order of kettle chips and to top it off, coconut & pecan crusted vanilla ice cream snowball with fudge sauce. Oink, oink, oink. This is the type of food I used to eat at 270 lbs. I cannot remember a meal like this in the last three years hence the 161 lb weigh in.

I was hoping to sleep hard, went to bed at 8:30 pm, but as usual I was up before 5 am. I made sure I took the prenatel vitamins with stoll softener last night. Anything lower than stomach region is in total revolt. It hurts to do anything. It's like someone shoved a stick in my belly button and stirred it around.

I'm a stubborn cuss so I went to the gym this morning. Here I am, shuffling along, can't even stand up straight, in gym shorts and a tank wandering into a room full of sweaty adults pounding away on cardio machines. So what do I do? Park myself on the windjammer (think upper body bicycle) and proceed to slowly workout. Eventually went to find the seated stair stepper when I got bored. That was a hard workout but the hot shower afterward was glorious.

Work today has not been good, I'm in pain and my boss was upset that I missed a day. He was nicer when I reminded him that yesterday was surgery day....hello.

Another reason to be depressed: fertilization report. 18 pulled out of me, 15 good enough to mess with and only 8 fertilized. When they stripped the coverings off the 15 they found two more old maids and 3 immature. Two of them didn't bother to fertilize for us, leave 8. They said 4 where grade 1 and 4 where grade 2 at the two cell stage. Nurse#1 says they'll check on them again tomorrow, pull the frontrunners to take to blast and freeze the rest. She said I sould expect either two excellent grade embies or one good one and two average ones for next week.

I know everyone says that 8 is great, but what's gonna be left by Tuesday of next week. Don't get me wrong, I don't want 8 babies, but it just adds to the depression that our cushion of eggs/embryos dimishes every day. I wanted to have extra to share, now I might not have enough for just me. :(

15 Eggs, and 3 Old Maids

Weight: 157.4 lbs
Mood: I'm in pain yet pleased
Medications: Doxycylcline twice per day

Egg retrival was this morning. I slept in until 6:45 am, showered, picked up the kitchen and tried to distract myself from my early morning hunger with gum. I wasn't supposed to eat or drink anything since midnight, but I know how easily I get dehydrated so I sipped water here and there to prevent that headache. I still had to take the antibiotic this morning. It has big red stickers...Take with 8oz water and take with meals. Of course I can't, so first 45 minutes after it hits my stomach are miserable. I thought I was gonna loose my cookies right there.

We waited until the last second for dh to produce his sample, hopped in the car and drove up to GR. I was driving and was too out of it being sick over the antibiotics to care that we where stuck behind a truck going 45 mph. We got there in plenty of time and got the parking spot closest to the door. I didn't want to have to navigate more than the one flight of stairs necessary to get out of RE's office. By the time we got there the worst of the antibiotic upset was over.

Going in there at 9:30 am is much more sedate than the 8:00 am rush. Nurse #2 got us squared away with urine samples, dh's blood sample, and the final consent to surgical procedure paperwork. They had me in a hospital gown and hooked up to heart rate moniter and blood pressure cuff while they where processing dh. I got to play a little with biofeedback on the moniters. My sitting heart rate was between 48-58 which set off the alarms when it dropped below 50. My blood pressure was in the 105/75 area.

My RE pops in, puts on his little surgical booties, hat & mask and proceeds to start my IV. He serenaded me with the little ditty "You're so vein, you probably think this needle is for you, you're so vein...." I musta been out of it, cause he was on the second refrain before I got the pun.

Dh gets to watch all garbed up in the corner. Nurse #1 joins us and fires up the good drugs. I assume the normal position and the drugs kick in. I know I was in pain. I can remember trying to resist it and stay relaxed. I remember both "excursions" into the ovaries, but I cannot remember any conversations going on around me. Dh says my face grimaced up and occasionally I would moan.

I don't really remember coming out of it. My first real memory is of Nurse #2 asking me if I'd like to sit up and Nurse #1 bringing in a juice box. Food! I wanted that juice box something fierce. They let me recover for a while. Sometime in there someone I asked what we got and Nurse #2 said 18 total eggs, 15 mature and 3 atretic (too old). Pretty good for the 17 follicles we found on Monday.

Nurse handed me some wash rags and a maxi pad. Now I expected blood, but geeze I left a mess on the table. I guess I assumed that follicles where full of clear liquid, dh assures me I was wrong. I was mobile at the point but still drugged enough to shuffle about and get dressed without assistance. Dh helped me down to the car and we where off in the bright morning sun, 2 hours after we arrived.

As we drove home and the drugs wore off the pain got bad. I had to eventually lie down. At first I wanted to stop in GR for lunch, then looking at the time I thought we could hold out for Hastings, by the time we got to the M-6 I just wanted to go home and sleep it felt so bad. I almost collapsed twice it was so bad walking into the house, but dh got me installed on the couch with an afgan and a Vicodin. An hour later I was fine and looking for decaf coffee and a bowl of oatmeal. Confort foods extrodinare! Even now it's like very, very bad constipation.

We'll go to the Walldorff tonight and since I'm doing a 5 day transfer I'm thinking beer, bbq, and dessert!

Ripening Egg Day

Weight: 159.6 lbs
Mood: Tired, but that's to be expected
Medications: Doxycycline twice per day (antibiotic for tomorrow's procedure)
Nurse's Restrictions: No sex, no milk products near antibiotic time.

So dh gave me the trigger shot last night at 11:30 PM. He was quite nervous about it, but I had it mixed and ready to go. Maybe he's afraid he would hurt me, but I've been enduring self adminstered sub-Q shots and all these blood draws, so what's another needle shoved in somewhere. He was really surprised how well the needle went in, and the injection itself didn't hurt much. I've looked three times and I can't find the exact spot he hit me at.

I tried to nap between the end of Biggest Loser and the shot while dh stayed up, didn't get much sleep. In fact I was up at 5 AM like usual with only 7 hours of sleep (again). This time I had a sore upper hip to boot.

So guess what I woke up with this morning....2 more lbs of Boobs! These are the real deal, the ones I used to have when I weighed 180-190ish. The ones I dieted out of because they where a real pain in the back. When I weighed in the 270's I was wearing a 46DDDD, when I got down to 180-190 I was wearing a 36DD/38D, but I felt between sizes and my back was killing me. I have the same issue that many post-bariatric/post-weightloss women have with bra sizing. I won't go into details but I went to bed a 36D- and woke up a 36D+ full figured.

I did Spinning class again today. I have less ovary awareness as the time has gone one, things have settled into new homes in my gut. I'm still restricting my movement on the bike and avoiding certain weight machines. The sandbag gut is an afternoon thing.

Less than 24 hours to egg retrieval, wish me luck!